I'm Starting To See Things

I remember at four years old
Head at a hundred and three
Eyes were foggy, mind was groggy
Clothes were soggy with sweat both hot and cold
Parents shambled into the room
Both did burn, boil, and bleed
Reaching for me, bodies gory
All the stories I feared were taking mold

I'm starting to see things in my innocent brain
And I wonder if I'll truly ever know sanity again

I remember at seventeen
Nestled tight in my sheets
Mind awaking, nerves a-quaking
Body aching to move a single inch
Roommate wandering 'round the room
While he was still asleep
Windows creaking, red eyes peeking
Something sneaking under the blanket's edge

I'm starting to see things, hear and feel them too
And I wonder if normality shan't be part of my milieu

And I wonder if I am still breathing
Or if my mind, my tricksy mind, is deceiving me
(Auditory, gustatory, no such thing as euphoria)
And I wonder if my heart's still beating
Because otherwise, I don't know why I would be bleeding this freely

I'm starting to see things even at thirty-one
And I wonder if my bout with madness has only just begun
So I'll just keep on seeing things with no end in sight
And I wonder, when I die, if I'll only see a trick of the light